Pratima Shah

   Some persons are 'perpetual waiters' who spend the time of their life in waiting. They are habituated with waiting; either small scale waiting like waiting at the station, waiting in line at the mall / traffic jams. Some wait for the right time to do what they want to do, some for the next holiday, some for the children to grow up - all these are examples of large scale waiting. People spend their life waiting for the right time to live a life of their desires.    This waiting is the state of mind of a person and is a signal that you are just stressed and worried about your future and thus you end up wasting your present. This stresses you because you get so busy in reaching your future destination that one reduces the present to merely a means to get there. When one wants to be in the future rather than living in the present; one is crushed in a split that is lacerating you deep inside. This way you are being instrumental in accelerating the aging process in...

    During an argument or a disagreement with someone, most of us operate from pride almost at all times . Whenever there is a difference of opinion between two persons what hurts the most is the pride not the difference. If someone is asked to submit a report to another colleague to maintain transparency and ensure smooth functioning; why should that person feel bitter about it? This bitterness is nothing but pride and is not at all related in anyway to sending the report. We humans are capable enough to turn simple things into complicated issues. There are many who have the tag of being a "complicated mind". The pride within the person narrows down to one's wants  / likes/ feelings. If there is compassion instead of pride the person would be living life on a huge canvas with a bigger perception.     When differences arise do not get into your toxic circle of what you want; instead try to look at the situation with a wider perspective. Watch your mind, is ...

   Every child around me; be it from primary / secondary / graduate school is full of anxiety. The anxiety to be first in everything he / she does. The anxiety to leave all behind and be ahead of all. All the children are running a race; thanks to our education system. The system and its functioning is the reason why the parents and teachers have created a competition in the classroom. Based on this competition every child feels that if she / he is first in everything he / she will be respected and rewarded by parents and teachers. If anyone fails he / she will be humiliated and belittled by all. Many of the children succumb to this pressure and anxiety and we find them lifeless going around in the journey of life.    From a very tender age this race begins in the education system. The children are brainwashed to stop living a life and be first. The result is that the child forgets everything and is on the run to put others aside to be first. I witness children ...

   A person who looks perfectly fine but is always going through some pain or the other in the body / may be dealing with health issues could be the one who has many unresolved issues / inner conflict. When we have an argument with someone; we argue, give reasons for our justification and resolve the matter. This happens with issues at the workplace or among friends. A human is capable enough to resolve the issues others than with the family. The reason for this is that every human is so much burdened with the pressures and expectations of the family. A woman once narrated a childhood incident of how her puppy died because of her. Her parents made her apologize to everyone in the family by writing an apology. She was just a child and barely 10 years. Her parents had asked her to take care of their pet as they were away. The girl herself had never got used to being with the puppy as it was barely fifteen days of buying the puppy as a pet. The girl was in her room doing her ...

     The heart wrenching and tragic case of rape and murder of the 26 year old veterinary doctor has left many women like me in a shock. Yet what is our system doing? Do we need to file a case and go through the procedures for such barbarians? They should be immediately killed without wasting time and resources. The intensity of the torture and the pain the girl must have felt is something unimaginable. What thoughts must be going on in her mind? Was she in that state to fight or did she fight? How miserable and devastated she must have felt!!! Watching the news made me numb; unable to think what the girl must have felt; tears rolling down my eyes. There is genuinely no safety in our country for girls. Our country is expert in filing cases and following procedures with no results and years of time wasted. There is a huge protest against those barbarians. Do those bastards deserve this? They just deserve a brutal death like the way they treated the doctor. At times I f...

     Confiding our pain, joy or secrets to someone close is one of the reasons why we have tags for the people in our life. One needs a besty to whom you can go and vent out whatever he / she wants. But if the tables turn around these sharing can be dangerous when the person has spilt out all the beans before someone. Due to this people warn one another about the distance to be maintained or a limit to be set. If you exceed this you are definitely going to pose problems for you in life. The thing to remember is that not everyone whom you consider a friend is your true friend. They may be many among those who are wolves in the disguise of a sheep. Such people are always on the move to fulfill their malice motives by stabbing you.    There are many instances of friends parting ways due to the giving out of a secret or by sharing confidential / personal secrets. One must be very cautious while sharing details of your life to someone; be it professional / perso...

   Strange as it seems, I have observed that most of us are very strong enough to handle failure. What we are unable to handle is the fear of rejection that comes with failure. It is dreary for us when the people around us perceive us in poor light. A considerable part of our identity depends on how others perceive us because humans are social animals. Our self worth relies on our apparent relative status that we hold in our social circle because the activities that happen within this circle are our mood busters. When these activities are declined to us or when they decrease we are in stress. Social rejection is a very paralyzing factor for human beings. Apart from social rejection, people can be rejected at an emotional / professional / physical level too. Due to this we never portray what we are in our true self nor do we pursue our passions. We suffer within ourselves and do not stop to please the expectations of our social circle.    It is said that those wh...