Adolescence

 

   The children today mature very at a very early age these days. They begin to lose their innocence at a very tender age around 5 -6 years. The food habits, sedentary life style and many other factors like television, mobiles and exposure to unnecessary things which cause a hormonal imbalance at a tender age makes them appear big physically but not mentally. The early adolescence brings in many issues which are not easily sorted out by the parent. Due to this the child is under too much pressure to belong to his/her circle. There is tough competition for today's child wherever he/she goes. This pressure results into too much of stress and depression in a child from a very young age.
   The child pulls away itself from the parents and blames the parents later for the loneliness and abandoning it. There is too much of conflict with resistance and the parent is blamed for not being a good communicator and not being a easy parent to live with. They want a lot of privacy and still they blame the parents for not understanding them or understanding too less. This phase is painful and lonely for the parents too because they too miss the moments of joy they once shared with the child. Those moments are now a history because despite of living together under the same roof the child is very very away from the parents emotionally. The children today do not want to be 'constant companions' of the parents. Its a tough time for the child as well as the parent.The child is looking forward to let go the trapeze of childhood and catch hold of the trapeze of growing up to a world of new experiences. The parent by nature becomes over protective to shield it and in return just gains the hatred and protests of the child.
   During these risky years of being an adult the parent must act as a safety net for the child. Be open to the changes and try to show unwavering love and openness to communicate. Try to help the child by showing them the right direction without any taunting or arguing. Build a trust level in your child that the child itself comes to you whenever required rather than being labelled as a tyrant parent in the eyes of the child.
   Rather than resenting this change of early adolescence be grateful to God for the closeness, compatibility and companionship which you enjoyed with your child in the early days. Treasure these memories and move on with the child. It is time for the parent also to grow up as the child grows up. If one parent is a strict one, the other parent needs to balance this with love and understanding. Even the child need to understand that parents are the only well wishers for him / her rather than being a difficult and tantrum child. Lot of maturity and understanding is needed at both the fronts to live happily and peacefully in a family.